Inspiration and crushed dreams all rolled in to one, that's what high-level Donkey Kong scores are. They show us what we'd potentially be capable of if we spent an inordinate amount of time jumping barrels and punching out rivets, but at the same time, they show us just how much time we'd have to put in to achieve that and it's demoralising.
That happened once again to this gamer when I viewed the new Kong Off 3 Online Open Qualifier scores, which have now been correlated. The top three participants all broke a million points and there was a handful of kill screens throughout the round – something that was far rarer back in 2008 when we first saw the documentary: King of Kong.
The top eight players who stand a good chance of heading to the Kong Off 3 – I think, forgive me for being a little confused about the Kong Off qualifying procedure, but it's unusually obtuse – are:
- Phil Tudose: 1,051,600
- Jon Mckinnell: 1,019,800
- Ben Falls: 1,012,700
- Jeff Wolfe: 997,800
- Eric Tessler: 966,000
- Corey Chambers: 964,500
- Chris Psaros: 893,100
- Robbie Lakeman: 851,300
Note that these rankings do not feature any of the current top ranked players in the world like Vincent Lemay, Hank Chien, or either of the pro/an-tagonists from King of Kong: Steve Wiebe and Bill Mitchell. Being ranked as they are, they get automatic entry into the Kong Off finals. However, ex-champion and oft forgotten Tim Sczerby does make an appearance in the qualifier tables, but his score wasn't good enough to place.
KitGuru Says: Considering my own best score is 77,000, you can understand why this list is depressing. Still, if I'd achieved that as part of the Kong Off qualifier, I'd have placed 38th out of 43. So not horrendous, I suppose.